Challenge: Prioritize

We recently saw it written in an advice column that one of the secrets of a healthy relationship is to pick your battles–have the things that you really care about, but learn to accept that the other person probably doesn’t share them.  So draw a reasonable line at what will absolutely drive you nuts, and then laugh about the rest of it.

Or something like that.

We think that advice is especially appropriate this week, as families and friends come together.  And, unfortunately,  gatherings like that always bring with them a certain amount of stress.  Days like Thanksgiving should be pleasant times that remind us of the joys of fellowship, not events that we dread.  And one of the best ways to ensure that that will be the case is to repeat after me:

“Do not make the perfect the enemy of the good.”

A spotless house is a wonderful thing, but a house filled with love and laughter and–yes, a few messes–is far better.  A tight, crisp schedule is a wonderful thing, but a few extra minutes spent with loved ones is far better.

Enjoy the Holiday this week–end enjoy the people who are a part of it!

The Gurus of Get It

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Get Over It

Or, more appropriately, get over yourself!

This is a variant of “Life is Not Fair,” in that it requires you to drop some of your preconceptions about your Life.  Working hard is wonderful, but will not get you your Perfect Life;  being talented is a gift, but will not get you your Perfect Life; being smart is very useful, but will not get you your Perfect Life; being attractive is great (or so we’ve heard), but it will not get you your Perfect Life.

The world is full of people who believe that because of their industry or their intellect or their talent that the world should be handed to them on a silver platter, and then they become embittered and frustrated when everything doesn’t work out the way they pictured it.  The one piece of the puzzle that’s missing is judgment!

You are your Choices–or rather, your Life is the sum of your Choices.  Choose wisely, following your Vision and your Values, and your Perfect Life becomes a reality;  choose poorly, and, well . . . .  bitterness and frustration.

The world doesn’t owe you anything.  But, generally,  it will generally reward you when you choose to do the right thing. 

The Gurus of Get It!

Failure Is Good

We just read an article about Tom Selleck and there was one line that really stands out where he says “Unless you treat failure as part of the journey, you’re never going to get anywhere.”  There is also an old story of a man who goes to see his clergyman and says “I am a failure because I fail in half the things I ever try.”  The clergyman tells him to go to page 425 in the almanac.  The man looks it up, goes back to the clergyman and says “Ted Williams, .344 lifetime batting average, I do not understand.”  The clergyman says “Ted Williams, the best all time hitter in baseball got out 1 out of every 3 times he went to the plate, so if you are failing only half the time, you are way ahead of the game.”

There is one sure way to never fail, and that is to never attempt anything and never put yourself in the game.  While you may not fail, you will also never grow, never learn and never experience the ultimate successes.  Our suggestion to everyone is to embrace the failure and know that with each one, you will be one step closer to your perfect life.

The Gurus of Get It!

Challenge: Forged By Fire

Swordmaking is an amazing art, as we understand it.  Take a piece of metal, put it in a very hot fire until it glows white, bang on it with a hammer, dunk it in cold water and repeat until the edge is sharp enough to split a hair.  In all that, the metal remains the same, it simply is shaped and hardened by the trials it is put through.

You should be the same way, and Life is that process.  The hard times you face, the difficulties and the frustrations, are all that fire; the people in your life, your teachers and mentors, are that hammer; and your support system, your loved ones, those are the cool water.  They are all necessary parts of the process, and none of them can be avoided or neglected.  And if you think maybe you can “shorten” the fire, you’ll end up cold and dull (to beat the metaphor to death!).

So this week, as the world is coming at you, don’t avoid or run from the difficulties or frustrations.  Instead, recognize them for what they are and dive in with both feet.  Just remember to call on teachers and friends as necessary.

The Gurus of Get It!

 

A Word Of Advice: Breathe!!

We’ve spend a lot of time and pixels over the last couple years giving advice on what you should be doing, how hard you should be working, and in what directions we think you should be looking as you build your Perfect Life. 

But we tend to forget one of the most important things you need to do every once in a while:

BREATHE!

Just slow down, stop, and take a good, deep cleansing breath–it’s good to take a moment to see how all the pieces you set into motion are moving.  Sometimes those pieces need to be re-shuffled; sometimes they just need to be re-energized a little bit; and sometimes they need to be completely redirected.  The point is this: if you’re always in motion yourself, how can you see which way you need to go?

So whether you’re in the middle of a big push, or maybe you’ve just completed some major piece of your Plan, it is always useful to stop and take a look around.

Just don’t forget to get yourself moving again!

The Gurus of Get It!

This Week’s Challenge: A Criticism-Free Week

We have written before about the negative effects of complaining, and of what it tells the world about US when we do complain.  Well, this weekend we want to take a different turn on that idea.

Complaining has a sister activity, in that this activity is focused on failure, is negative and a “downer,” and it often disguises itself in humor or in “helpfulness.”  The big difference is that while complaining tends to focus on ourselves (“look how bad MY life is), Criticism usually focuses directly on the failures and shortcomings of another person.  And it doesn’t really matter if the criticism is being delivered to the offending party or not–in fact, criticism is a more pronounced character flaw when the criticism is just being presented to a sympathetic audience that is unrelated to the event. 

To avoid criticizing for a week would free up a great deal of conversation time for more uplifting topics, it would free up your mental energies to try to find the good in others, and it would [maybe] help you remember that everybody is going through something even if you don’t know what it is, and that generally people do try to do the right thing.  So try to be gracious and give people the benefit of the doubt . . .

But just for a week. [sarcasm]

The Gurus of Get It!

The Power Of Change

As we write this blog, we are very aware that different readers come to this from different places in their lives.  While our target audience is 16-24 year olds just getting started in life, we know there is a much broader spectrum of people reading this, and some of them are not just starting out, but maybe looking to start over.  This post is for them.

Your life is all yours–the good, the bad, the ugly and the sublime.  And every decision you have made shapes that life.  And while other people contribute, the only role they play is generally one of “stream” while you command the boat and make all the real decisions.  As such, if you’re not happy with the direction of your life, there’s only one place to look–the mirror.  No matter how many self-help books or life coaches or 12-step programs you jump into, in the end the power of change is only somewhere inside of you.  Even Faith only works change through internal retrofitting.

By the way, this truth is important from the other end of things as well.  You cannot actually change another person.  You can set an example and let them find the way on their own, but in the end they have to make the change for themselves.

The Gurus of Get It!

Your Best Self!

The Best Self is a rare and wonderful thing.  We read somewhere that only 1 in a million people actually try their best at all times, in every aspect of their lives.  That’s unfortunate, but those people are truly living the life of the Best Self.  The Best Self IS someone who can be an everyday thing, and it doesn’t have to be through the big gestures.

Imagine how different your life could be if you just made every decision with the idea that it would be your Best Self acting out that decision (and you would be doing your best all the time).  And then imagine what might happen if that Best Self actually was the person acting out every decision you make.  It IS possible–you could be that one-in-a-million person!  And while that may seem like an extreme position, we would love for you to be giving your all to being your Best Self all the time (along with reaping the “rewards” for making it happen).

So just for this week (as a start) go into everyday and try to be your best and do your best in every aspect of your life.  Maybe, just maybe, you can make it habit and then really start to see what you are capable of accomplishing.

The Gurus of Get It!